the use of the N-word in Peru and Latin America
Recently, I had a conversation with someone about English words and phrases that have been normalized in conversation here in Peru. Fairly normal words came up like "chill" and "cool." And then he added that it's also normal for him and his friends to say "What's up n*gga!" (That specific phrase, apparently).
The first time I saw the n-word used while here in Peru was on the Instagram story of a random girl that I had met at a club and started following: she had posted a picture of her and a friend and captioned it "tarde de n*ggas" -- which doesn't even really make sense?? I was shocked to see that word outside of an American context - although I suppose in retrospect so much knowledge of American English words, phrases, and cultural practices have made their way to Peru that this really should not have been a surprise. Apparently, this is one American-ism that has transferred over minus the cultural context (which one could argue is the most significant part of the word itself).
In both instances (with the girl on Insta and with the other dude in real life), I tried to explain that the n-word is extremely offensive thanks to its history of racism and oppression and that neither of them (as non-black people) have any place using it. With the girl, I was left on read and with the guy we proceeded to have an infuriating conversation in which he essentially mansplained the n-word and its usage to me (despite the fact that he grew up in Peru. And I was born and raised in the States. Where the word originated. 🙄)
Really, according to this guy, the problem is that in America we are too closed minded and that we shouldn't get so offended by something as simple as a word. Apparently, according to him, everything regarding race is more relaxed here in Peru (not true by the way) and really every insult or slur can be turned into a term of endearment depending on the connotation, inflection, and who you're talking to (which is actually true). But comparing the US and Peru is essentially comparing apples and oranges; the fact that in Spanish the word "negro/a"/"negrito/a" can be used as a term of endearment does not mean that the n-word can also used by non-black people as an affectionate term. Also, one cannot equate words like "negrito" with "n*gga." He tried to argue that he doesn't mean it in a racist way when he uses it, therefore it is not racist in its usage.
I then explained that in the US outside of its racist use the n-word can actually be turned into a term of endearment -- such as the words he was describing in Peru like cholo, perra, etc. -- but that really only Black people are allowed to use it in that way. That's when he basically lost his mind out of pure indignation and proceeded to explain to me that the REAL discrimination in this situation is that only Black people can use the word, and that he's "not racist" because he has Black friends and he calls them negro and todo tranquilo blah blah blah.
It was an exhausting conversation because no matter how many times I explained to him that the n-word should not be used by non-black people and that its usage outside of that category perpetuates system of racism, oppression, and bigotry, he did not listen. He kept repeating that "words were created for man's use" (whatever) and kept trying to get me to say it, and then used his masterful deduction powers to tell me that I am too uptight and that's why I'm stressed out all the time. Thanks.
He then explained to me that when he uses the word, he doesn't feel anything. Therefore any emotional reaction to hearing it must be an overreaction. This was followed by another round of me attempting to explain that of course he doesn't feel anything, the word is very uniquely rooted in American history and it makes sense that usage outside of that setting would not elicit the same recoil. However, this doesn't mean that it is not still racist. You cannot use a word that you have never been oppressed by - and that is that.